There's a "art of the blow job" class in the city. We should go
Baby, I'm all set with that. That would be like trying to teach bruce lee how to kick someone in the head
fyi, we didn't break up, we just downgraded to occasional sex without ever talking about it.
tonight is going to be epic. can you pre-book an ambulance?
he got promoted. that means i have now given my new boss chlaymida. i need a new job.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I mean what are real friends for if they won't hold down your wedding dress to allow for a keg stand
trying to imitate man vs food after 12 shots doesnt mean youll get laid
Do you have any idea how horrifying it is to hear your sister and her husband fucking then immediately go down stairs only to hear your parents fucking....... I wish I was Hellen Keller right now.
I was only out of town for 1 week. His cell records show he texted 63 ex-gfs and hookups while I was gone. And 10 condoms are missing.
That money I left you should go to the stripper that fell asleep in your bed. Sorry
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yup. Can I borrow your penis decanter for my Xmas party on Saturday
Found my id. It was in the cats litter box. Seriously what was last night.
Dude. I need you to practice dancing around in your banana hamock. Party boy style. I'll call later with details.
Why did the sexual harassment class show a clip from frozen?
We are taking a shrt nap on the sidewalk cme fine me if you want but dont wake me up
Drunk me says 72 hours of Mexican Viagra and room service.Sober me says we stopped being lovers for a reason after the last lost weekend.
Randomize