Just watched a guy pause a bluetooth convo to puke outside of esso. gotta love orangeville
I only broke up with her because the ex sex is amazing. She will do ANYTHING if i even hint at getting back together
i just saw some one pass a baby through the drive-thru window at dairy queen.
all i know is that each time we woke up we were at a different chinese restaurant. help.
Using a Nedi Pot after doing lines... at least I'm a health conscious drug user?
Apparently, we were running around the apartment, singing into pickles, the routinely slapped our passed out friends with them.
I'm sad we weren't friends when I went through my "I like drugging my friends" phase
I only listened to his story about leaving the Amish community because I was hoping for a free drink
Everyone heard you scream that I was to be naked, in your bed in 5 minutes. We were one hell of a shitshow spectacle
I know I've become a responsible adult because this time, I'm not going to do the drugs I found on the ground
First night of sleeping in the same bed, and she farted on me. I immediately excused myself and went home. Don't know if we're still together. Will update you.
Hell no. Last time I used a Slip N Slide I ended up with bruised ribs, a broken fence and the hatred of a half naked girl with a sprained wrist.
the police dropped me off. that's how my night went.
So the vodka/tequila mix went down fine but the burp made me cry
You ever have a fart follow you around?
Randomize
