I don't understand why some guys want to have a huge conversation while standing at the urinal with cock in hand...
im about as happy as oj after his trial
Is it wrong that im more embaressed about the karoke than the toplessness?
WTF WHY ARE YOU STILL NOT DOING A BEER BONG?! THE TOILET CLOG CAN WAIT
If tjhis were a lake full of vodka and i were a ducl Id swim my way down and ddrink my way up
The last thing I remember is trying to split my bridesmaid dress down the back like the incredible hulk.
and you succeeded.
We fucked to the rythmn of the thunder, it was magical
For my birthday I want you to get me in bed with Donald Trump. That is all. You have 3 months
I found my soulmate. Behold my idiot as we spaz into the sunset.
Thank god I work in a lab. This pinkeye is out of control and my safety glasses are the only thing stopping me from digging at my eye with a pen
Okay penises are actually pretty exciting. The people attached to them are an entirely different story
i showed up really high and was trying to not be,so in order to not seem high, i got plastered
I don't think I can get drunk, high or horny enough to even consider that
Went to waffle house after dropping my sister off at school and got into a heated argument with a drunk/hungover philosophy professor I will not name. I won the argument.
If I'm getting through this pandemic I'm doing it drunk.
Randomize
