His pickup line was "I'll eat you out"
He did it well too
Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
It wasn't a wasted relationship. I got road-head in an Escalade. I still keep that with me.
I was on hold waiting for customer service at verizon so we obviously we had enough time to have sex, i just put the phone on speaker
Waiting outside the STD clinic 30 min before it opens already in a line up. It's like were all waiting for a concert that no ones really pumped for
I left my Thanksgiving family dinner puking in my hands from the worst hangover in the world
I've started grabbing my boobs in front of my lesbian philosophy professor so she'll give me a better grade. It's working...
I can't believe they didnt cut us off after we all hugged each other and started singing "were the 3 best friends that anybody could have" RIGHT IN FRONT of the bar and bartender...
Yea you just drank all the Hookah water, then started talking gibberish about the Kool Aid you just drank.
Turns out he has a 6pack too. Alright adorable snapchatting manwhore dude, you win.
I just licked wine off my own thigh. I've hit a new low.
You know you gave a quality blow job when you have to ice your neck and jaw the next day.
Like I said, all hypothetical...unless, of course, you'd be into that. My heart may skip a beat.
Well, I just puked in the shower in case anyone wants an update on how my day is going
OH DEAR GOD IT GOT IN MY MOUTH AGAIN HELP
Randomize
