Ok let's jusst not talk today bc then we'll just do dangerous things but I'll say hello
i think my mom watched the whole time
I found out during it when he said "my girlfriend never does this" so he's all to blame, I had no idea until half way through.
Wait, how is it that I'm just getting ready to go out and you're already showing your penis to freshmen girls?
scarred for life. way too high and witnessed some chick give a dude head on the dance floor
The key to alley sex is drunkeness.
So I realized I was officially over him when I was getting a lap dance on the keg bus at 3am from his old boss and I was double fisting:)
I'm so confused. I feel like I just intentionally took roofies to see where I'd end up.
Let's just say after this weekend I'm known as Shameous the Irish bar fighter.
Siri just called me GayBoy in front of my family. I will destroy you.
I sent him a bunch of texts telling him that his beard wasn't long enough yet so we couldn't fuck and to text me back in a few hours if it had.
you and him went to the park at 2am to "catch a pigeon" and ACTUALLY CAME BACK WITH A PIGEON
I just talked this guy out of hooking up with me and gave him relationship advice. Am I a good person now?
I feel like I missed the land of milk and honey and instead wound up in the land of beer and pizza. And yet, I think I'm happier here.
I just don't know how to say "I want to have sex you with before you graduate" in a classy way
Randomize
