I haven't been able to trust a girl since spanks came out
whatever sunny in Philadelphia does on Thursday nights, I'm doing all weekend.
i just keep taking vicodin and supergluing random shit
Had to make a piece of abstract art. Your dick is in it
FUCK YOU CALIFORNIA. YOU DO NOTHING RIGHT. FIRST PROP 8 AND NOW THIS.
I had to convince you not to write "happy birthday to the first guy who fingered me" on his facebook wall, right above the post from his current girlfriend's mother.
Did he seem like the type of guy that would maybe take weed as payment?
You Just stopped dancing, looked at me and said "I'm gonna make it rain" Then shook the open box of crunch berries everywhere.
From now on, you must never doubt my ability to go from drunken rambling lovesick girl to Stepford wife within the course of a few hours.
I need to reevaluate. My boss gave me drug money. I overslept on my couch. And I had my student teacher go to McDonald's and get an egg mcmuffin for me.
I think you just miss his friendship.
I think it's his ability to give me multiple orgasms.
I'm hungover during 4th grade graduation practice. I AM THEIR FUTURE.
On a side note, my ex husband offered to buy me shrooms
how did i manage to wake up with my bra on backwards?
I have cats now. Five of them.
Have you considered starting a global domination firm?
Randomize
