I pooped in a mop bucket.
WTF???
Their employee restroom was locked what kind of customer service is that
I have a ginormous moral hangover. Strip club blues.
Cocaine Wednesdays have to stop turning into no work Thursday
But I feel like studying my flashcards during a blowjob would be rude...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I remember seeing his penis I just dont know exactly what I did with it
5% want to drink juice and feel better, 95% just want to touch your butt
He made me cum via FaceTime, then he made me look at his stock investment charts..
omg how embarrassing to not hear the delivery person knocking because you're singing "where are you Pizza" to the tune of "where are you christmas" too loudly
According to timehop today marks the 3rd anniversary of my 1st blackout
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The candles are lit, the magic circle is drawn, now all we need to do is get naked and see how many orgasms we can manage.
I was totally going to fuck him and then his friend walked in brushing his teeth, whipped down his pants and started doing the windmill. Ultimate cock block
She just took all of the blankets in the house and threw them in the yard, because 'the grass was cold'..
You invited these random guys into your apartment that you met in the hallway...& then you started screaming at them to get out cause you didn't know who they were.
party at the soccer house. crumbs in my sexy panties. can't. put. pieces. together.
Go ahead without me. This chick is buying me drinks and just found out her husband is cheating on her. I think I just found the next level of revenge fucking: Scorned Trophy Wife Sex
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