wat bout pragnant strippers??
all i know is i woke up with a braid in my hair and i vaguely remember a cab driver telling me he would give me $10,000 to get him a green card. and he would take me to turkey. and give me free cab rides. im never drinking on my medicine again. lol.
just got the results back. i love his dick even more now i know its clean
i don't know. but im upstairs in the closet with a burger i found in their fridge
CHEMICAL ENGINEER. God my mom would be so proud of me.
You talked about giving to sperm banks on a first date. What did you expect?
Hey. There is naked girl with "plz don't touch her. She just turned 21" sharpied on her chest. What happened last night?
And then he said he would build me a mountain dew water fountain
Marry him now.
He said I showed up in just my underwear and a bunch of towels I stole from the party I was at.
How would your parents feel if we installed a sex swing?
I just wanted a bootycall and now somehow I'm at his parents playing dominoes. But they have tequila so it's cool
She's seen your dick through your pants. You don't need to ask
The cat ate a weed mint. This is not a drill
Having to do the walk of shame on crutches was defiently a first for me. cheers to the governor, klove
if I dont text you back in 10min assume i am in fact still dizzy and injured myself in the shower. and call an ambulance. thanx.
Randomize
