ohhhh fuckk. chicks a dude.
I just woke up to crumpled tissues everywhere. Looks like it was another night filled with tears and semen.
Hannah Montana > iCarly
I'm disregarding that text and your testicles entirely
I'm sorry you missed class, the topic today is copy and paste. I'm not even kidding.
Fell into a man hole last night. I've been bleeding since 11pm. Got kicked out of the bar for being bloody.
It got awkward when the girl working at planned parenthood continued to hit on me, after she knew about my STDs.
Had sex on a washing machine in a pool of beer. Can you say success.
Ate apple sauce off his penis. Nutritious and slutty.
we were totes just talking about. huu in the bathbub. 5 girlszzz
Well I squeegeed the puke off your arm at the gas station
So getting drunk in honor of the bomb threat is legit right?
She busted her face in a tragic twerking accident. Marking the 2nd time I have peed my pants laughing.
ANNA HAS DISCOVERED EROTIC FANFICTION OF SHARKNADO THIS IS NOT A DRILL
A homeless man gave him a blanket and an ambulance drove him to sarahs...
So I fell alseep while I was motorboating that girl last night infront of the entire party.
Randomize
