i don't like sucking hair
my friend asked What a UTI was in front of everyone, letts just say his girlfriend was a lil pissed
my family just sang happy birthday to baby jesus. no ones even drunk yet
hes a good boy he deserves a good blow
Weird we were more concerned with sharing our germs than tag teaming the blow job?
The swelling on my elbow and tongue means I may have cockblocked myself.
you were upstairs in your room looking out your window and saw him puking in your bushes outside. you then proceeded to open the window and sing Come To My Window
I think my hookup is starting to fall for me. Time to break his heart.
I am in his childhood bedroom and I feel like his trophies are applauding me and his stuffed bunny is disgusted with me. Did you know he was a mathlete?
Yup. Can I borrow your penis decanter for my Xmas party on Saturday
Then he kissed my hand sensually and said "you're a Black Queen. Don't let anyone tell you different."
We share an apartment, weed and genitals. It's called being practical not in love.
I may not have my dignity, pride or sanity but I have my pants.
He may have been a dick but he DID give me his Netflix log in. Maybe some good did come of it.
THE SUN DOESNT SET TIL 647 YAAAAASSSSSSSSSS. Goodbye seasonal depression hello regular depression
Randomize
