I wish I could still say I don't know that you taste like bad ice cream.
its summer. and we all know college gfs do not count in summer.
college gfs dont count ever. theyre like getting corn rows in jamaica. you feel cool at the time. then you go home and people make fun of you.
How can people commit suicide when things like bagels exist
They have an open bar at this baby shower. I was born to be Cuban.
the tow truck driver and i bonded while discussing our experiences with four lokos
My brother just put in eyedrops to talk to my mom on the phone
He also has a monumental penis. It's unbelieveable. I'm sorry but he's perfect.
Ya well here is the deal with last night, it was the Biggest shit show we have ever co-stared in.
Thinking of someone think of me while masturbating while I masturbate. & that's how the over thinkers do it ✌️
Of course I'm using oj as a mixer, its flu season.
If he cant deal with my insomnia and sex drive I really feel sorry for his child and ex fiance. Adulthood breakups are depressing.
Well, i'm not hugging a bag of cheetos and crying while I watch Friends wishing that we were Ross and Rachel. So clearly I'might doing better than last night.
I'm not in it for just the sex. If I wanted mediocre dick once a week I would have stayed with one of my exes.
It wasn't until I lost my earring that I realized "I've been here before". Turns out we fucked a year ago. We've decided to make it a tradition.
He just sprayed AXE in his mouth to get rid of his bad breath... THAT DRUNK
Randomize