Doo rag and shades in the bar. You are missing your future husband.
I know it's getting bad when I wash the bong more often then the dishes
just had to take a 4 hour nap to write a one page paper. its obviously the week after winter break.
yeah, and then after the convo was clearly over, my dad decides to scream "SIZE MATTERS" just to make things even more uncomfortable.
I just can't bring boyfriends home.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you'll be glad to know I got kicked off the microphone at a bar in Breckenridge last night thanks to my country rendition of all star
I feel so much closer to you now that I heard your poop splash into the toilet.
Exactly. wat kind of friend would i be if i even pretended to give a shit about ur problems
Dangr zzzzzzzzone
My sister hid me from my parents, brought me a bloody mary, and told my girlfriend I was out with my dad. For 13, I got to say she's working out pretty good.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude, she sent me a nude of her posing in the mirror and her dad was in the reflection
i need some food
Holy shit I forgot about you stabbing him.
There is a midget driving a powered tricycle around town. I am not drunk, stoned, or lying.
I think he's like 40 and maybe a little sociopathetic and i have never been so turned on
Another text to add to the intervention pile, i see
Maybe snorting K off penises isn't healthy
man fuck you i am a delight. you're the one who fucking set his tree on fire while high
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