I had a disgustingly explicit dream last night involving myself and lil wayne.
how do we leave politely?
Tell them I'm going into labor. I will spill a beer and tell them m water broke.
six shots in, he is hammered and doing stretches before each shot
i just fucked the bartender on my cruise to get free alcohol. have things gone too far?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She took off her pants and it was like seeing an old friend.
no normal human would even think about making waldo slutty but you
Well i'm not entirely sure considering he gave my vagina an early valentine's day card that said "you're purrfect."
Every fourth of July I get sentimental when I think back to the one where we drove around baked off our asses crashing multiple cookouts listening to Team America's "America, Fuck Yea" on repeat. I miss us.
Of course... Double fistin nati light cuz the powers out and it cuts down the times i gotta open the fridge... Genius
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She clicked her fingers, said "here boy!", and pointed at her vagina.
I just windexed my mirror headboard, Lets get to work.
I wish I had a picture of me and ron helping that stripper lick her own vagina
I feel worse lying to the guy I hooked up with than I actually do for cheating on my bf
Tears For Fears is the only thing getting me through life at this moment.
She's got a shotglass necklace, running down the street asking people to "fill her up". Get here.
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