A big part of growing up is learning how to tastefully stare at women
The things that come out of my body both amaze and disturb me.
why dont you just whore around college until someone loves you...thats how it works for girls isnt it?
Could you explain why there is an Australian passport in your toilet?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He's crying and calling me out on using him. It's awful. And I'm too drunk to leave.
He was ugly. Like horse ugly. But he was built for power, not for speed.
I fed him jelly beans while he fingered me. Win, win situation.
I think my sister is getting tired of me breaking into her house so I can sleep with random girls when shes not there
No matter what I do you still love me. It's like loving a retarded kid. A retarded kid that keeps trying to sleep with you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now Heβs Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've been there a week.. I'd rather all my coworkers not know that I'm already sleeping with my boss.
On the plus side, I know I'm allergic to latex now. Like really fucking allergic
You have to give it to him that he fucked me out of the dull weekdays.
Just had a smooth transition from sexting to buffalo chicken dip πππ
Your skills amaze me
Dude did you see that video of yourself crying while bathing in vodka on YouTube?
i came so much i feel like i were to try again, only dust would come out. and maybe glitter
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