You should just wear a sign that says "I like cheap Chinese food and anal"
I like taco bell too
you would pick up someone in the library
just used a paint mixing cup as a shot glass. thank u art school.
I can handle NPR. I speak hippie. I took it in college.
there's another hole in my ceiling...someone fell through the attic this time....
not much sitting here stoned eating my little sisters halloween candy and judging each individual hersheys candy bar and after much deliberation by the selection committee the original hersheys chocolate bar won
I feel like on the last day of finals we should run around campus dressed like Moses screaming "LET MY PEOPLE GO!!!!"
I'll start the recruiting
That pizza at 1 am literally tasted like I was eating an angel
I love you, and I just washed my hair in my work sink with handsoap.
Just by hearing the girl outside reciting the info on her fake ID, I know it's gonna be a good night
You just kept mumbling about the carpet being covered in stains that looked like the face of God. Until you decided that they were closer in relation to Dumbledore.
Wow i just puked in front of the lady that was drug testing me. I passed though!
So my dad just asked, "did you leave without pants a lil bit ago?"
How was your night?
Good. I made people cry and run home
To potentially get me laid, I need you to send me your favorite memes.
Randomize
