I am at a 420 party and i just told a girl "hey, less not getting donuts, more getting donuts"(1-855): and did she get any doughnuts?
No. I am devastated
We just picked up about 540 lbs of women....
then i got kicked out of the bar for trying to pay my $30 bar tab in sacajawea dollar coins
The whole way homeyou were flapping your arms up and down, and when I asked why you said you were trying to tell Tony Danza about the angels.
i found out what alaskan girls practice during those six months of darkness
I am wasted and people are fist pumping. This should not happen on the west coast.
Is it wierd that you're going to be my best man and you've fucked my wife?
And why did 3 people fail to stop me from literally getting a piggy back ride from the bar to his apartment?!
does it count as a threesome if she tried to blow the dude who was passed out next to us?
no more heavy drinking durning the lady that cleans the office told me i have to emtpy my own thrash if i puke in it
are you still mad that doritos made their way into my sex life
.....a litte
my roommate made out with a guy wearing a squirrel costume, equipped with a blow up tail. time to start harvesting nuts for the winter
Stoned, drunk, and walking into the library. Look at me multitasking!
That is was cool to fuck the single mother accross the street until every girl i bring home gets the car keyed.
I mean in all honesty I would let James Franco shit on my chest. End of story
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