Texts From Last Night

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  (412): View more from Pennsylvania

  my roommates friend slept in my bed when i was out of town..she ran out screaming cause she saw my VCR

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  (412): my roommates friend slept in my bed when i was out of town..she ran out screaming cause she saw my VCR http://tfl.nu/zpxr
  Replies (4) Good night (886) Bad night (977)
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  (916): View more from California

  I hate ducks.

  (916): View more from California

  What?

  (916): View more from California

  they're sketch. like squirrels. squirrels are sketch as fuck.

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  (916): I hate ducks. (916): What? (916): they're sketch. like squirrels. squirrels are sketch as fuck. http://tfl.nu/gesm
  Replies (55) Good night (3537) Bad night (883)
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  (702): View more from Nevada

  i kinda do this "flirt with girls and pretend to be a hot white guy named chris" thing

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  (702): i kinda do this "flirt with girls and pretend to be a hot white guy named chris" thing http://tfl.nu/wbpb
  Replies (6) Good night (981) Bad night (1942)
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  (858): View more from California

  i am fully taking advantage of taking advantage of him

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  (858): i am fully taking advantage of taking advantage of him http://tfl.nu/fwf2
  Replies (5) Good night (3217) Bad night (519)
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  (860): View more from Connecticut

  He told me he had herpes after I put his hotdog in my mouth

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  (860): He told me he had herpes after I put his hotdog in my mouth http://tfl.nu/3n80
  Replies (54) Good night (720) Bad night (10415)
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  (801): View more from Utah

  Who the hell brings a 6pack to a party. I'm trying to make mistakes.

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  (801): Who the hell brings a 6pack to a party. I'm trying to make mistakes. http://tfl.nu/ehqx
  Replies (17) Good night (1047) Bad night (3365)
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  (304): View more from West Virginia

  As weird as that was it was probably the best advice i've ever gotten from a tranny

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  (304): As weird as that was it was probably the best advice i've ever gotten from a tranny http://tfl.nu/vl4i
  Replies (15) Good night (4175) Bad night (1111)
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  (817): View more from Texas

  I was just informed that you are the reason for my 2 missing front teeth.

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  (817): I was just informed that you are the reason for my 2 missing front teeth. http://tfl.nu/n8z4
  Replies (15) Good night (1067) Bad night (4331)
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  (706): View more from Georgia

  He had a beer bottle in each of his back pockets and was on rollerblades. All I remember is following him for about 10 minutes

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  (706): He had a beer bottle in each of his back pockets and was on rollerblades. All I remember is following him for about 10 minutes http://tfl.nu/an5y
  Replies (4) Good night (3609) Bad night (783)
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  (716): View more from New York

  whatever a "slut portfolio" is, mine is apparently almost complete

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  (716): whatever a "slut portfolio" is, mine is apparently almost complete http://tfl.nu/s3e3
  Replies (6) Good night (2837) Bad night (1055)
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  (479): View more from Arkansas

  Oh my god. My pre-date bowl for nerves tuned into "I'm too high for this date" he kept talking about trucks and I couldn't stop making racial slurs.

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  (479): Oh my god. My pre-date bowl for nerves tuned into "I'm too high for this date" he kept talking about trucks and I couldn't stop making racial slurs. http://tfl.nu/zkx1
  Replies (13) Good night (2978) Bad night (2270)
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  (360): View more from Washington

  He got completely naked and is now just standee there next to my bed poking at my hamster. Why can't I get sex the normal way.

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  (360): He got completely naked and is now just standee there next to my bed poking at my hamster. Why can't I get sex the normal way. http://tfl.nu/k068
  Replies (7) Good night (590) Bad night (1362)
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  (208): View more from Idaho

  Until they make a bed that bathes you in your sleep, I will not be satisfied.

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  (208): Until they make a bed that bathes you in your sleep, I will not be satisfied. http://tfl.nu/8j3b
  Replies (6) Good night (851) Bad night (418)
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  (416): View more from Toronto

  I feel like im becoming the girl who only drunk texts him. I would be in the dog house, if situations like this had dog houses.

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  (416): I feel like im becoming the girl who only drunk texts him. I would be in the dog house, if situations like this had dog houses. http://tfl.nu/2j5j
  Replies (1) Good night (449) Bad night (301)
• Favorite

  (773): View more from Illinois

  i saw way too much penis for that to have been a funeral

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  (773): i saw way too much penis for that to have been a funeral http://tfl.nu/9aoc
  Replies (4) Good night (483) Bad night (309)

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