i stapled my math hw together with an ear ring, too ghetto?
My mom is helping me re-arrange my room to make New Year's more hook-up friendly
Today I met the neighbor that shares my bedroom wall. When I pointed out my unit, he said, "Oh, that's you? Oh... that's you." I didn't think much of it until I was in bed tonight and I heard him clear his throat. He's. Heard. Everything.
also, I just found three random bruises on my knee. probably from when I was velcrod to the stairs
He just turned 21, it's very obvious the end of their relationship is near. Now we play the waiting game.
Just called the consul general of France "dude"
I woke up to her screaming at the various pictures of nutsacks she found on her camera
Dude, jerking off when you're all hopped up on pre workout energy supplements has got to be the greatest thing I've ever done.
he made a bon jovi sex playlist and started crying when "i'll be there" came on... how was your night?
Apparently it's bring your ugly annoying ass piece of shit slob of a baby day at work
I mean he did ask and he said it's cold out but i didn't realize we were that comfortable hahaha sex is one thing but borrowing a sweatshirt?
Locking that text forever.
Just used my eyelash curler to open a bottle of cider...
Had to leave my skype meeting to vomit. I'm obviously ready for the real world.
Hey guys.. So I accidentally broke the front door last night
I'm 22 and I'm drinking hawaiian punch from a sippy cup. Everything is right in the world.
Randomize
