There is no way he is gay with that hair.
she takes plan B like it's going out of style
this kid in class is playing minesweeper and just slammed the desk because he lost. thank god were normal.
Nah you can have him. There's too many men in my life right now. I can't handle another dick.
True. She actually gives a fuck. A quality looked down upon if she wants to be one of us
I just woke up with a bunch of French fries in my hand and a chocolate shake balancing on my pillow. Lovely.
She just took the bottle of jager to the bathroom and locked the door. Now I hear the water running..if the house floods she's paying for it
Thank you for calling me on to a higher level of debauchery. fuck anyone who says we aren't good for each other
You could make a naked club. One member, you. One president, you.
You were greeting everyone with " Hi I'm Jess show me your dick" whether they were dudes or not.
You don't know scared until you've just begun the first stage of an acid trip till a guy on stilts with a creepy mustache and beard says "enter the Forrest"
And my nipple is sore from him biting it. That is not a complaint.
That was the night you tried to convince me you threw up your sould because your throwup was black
It's 9:07 in the morning and I am so hungover right now I'm about to take the kids I'm babysitting to mf'ing Popeyes bc that's all I want in this world
OMG WE ARE UP TO THREE MINORS WORKING HERE. I AM NOT READY FOR THIS MID LIFE CRISIS.
Randomize
