I just remembered we said the Lord's Prayer before we went out last night.
Also, I once came to the conclusion after this one boy, that her pleasure condoms are a college boys version of flowers
We had sex in front of Notre Dame Cathedral, but I lost my wallet. God giveth and God taketh away.
There's always the 'not have sex with the drunk girl I just met at some party' option.
That was the plan but Tequila showed up at the party too.
she gave me head while i watched the '98 Rose Bowl on espn classic. Ryan Leaf really was a huge bust
Might just stay in and drink cuz of the hurricane. Yea I think Wisconsin might be safe but its a good reason to drink.
No it's cool, He's been doing my English papers in exchange for lap dances since the eleventh grade. We're very professional.
You had a hot dog outside the bar then made me stop at McDonald's for a double quarter pounder. I'd say you've more than filled your drunken meat quota.
Ugh did we play golf last night and did you by chance hit my head with a club or a ball?
He said to use 30 racks as chairs and then drink til we fall thru the box
Woke up in her bed this morning with a half used condom stuck to the side of my face
How can a condom be "half used"?
He showed up at my front door with Plan B and a rose...
I only get hit on by people going through their midlife crisis. Yes, I did purposely write that gender neutral.
Im just an angry damaged little elf who wanders around and tries to find drugs.
Please stop calling me a pterodactyl during sex. It only happens when you're drunk, but still.
Randomize
