My new storm is the chrons
The only reason I needed a new one is bc I threw up on my other one(248): And since Verizon doesn't have a throw up test, I was eligible for a new one
Third unemployed latin in my bed this week. I'm on a roll
Apparently Chef Boyardee is the only guy I'm taking home tonight.
I would have to gauge my vagina to make it fit.
Seius question. Does a penis floar when ina baht? Must find out.
ALSO, bringing a stapler to the bar is a good idea
Im so excited to get permanently banned for life from all the old bars again, it is gonna be christmas after all
well the blowjob for study guide exchange was a success.
your fridge is broken, your sock drawer is full of snow, and you flipped off the whole stadium on the big screen. I'd say it went well.
Just had hot animal sex with the guy who had been sending me 10 second selfie snapchats for the past month
I didn't wake up drunk this year...I must be getting soft
Yeah I guess quad-fisting Miller Lites just isn't as effective as it used to be
ELLEHCIM
NYRMAK
DRAHCIR
WHAT??
I don't think I've ever been sadder than the way I feel when I finish my meal while I'm high
His phone started ringing when we were pulled over and he said 'hold on, this is most likely more important than you', proceeded to answer it and agree to work sunday, then hung up, looked at the cop and told him to continue.
Thrres cinnamon everywgte. Plead cine get me
Randomize
