quadriplegic porn is always funny
no. no its not
You kept shouting "Relax and take notes" every time before you would hit the blunt
So chef boyardee smells exactly the same after you throw it up
i literally discovered the exact same thing last week. i had the lasagna one
ravioli
New plan: we get a little bit drunk and go to 24 hour fitness and be eachothers wing people so we can hit on in shape hot people at a gym instead of drunk idiots at a bar.
Somewhere along the night we ended up at a food lion giving jello shots to high school girls.
Just used "I used to work as an inflatable toy operator" as a pick up line. Freshman frenzy is great...
I've got my wine, though it wasnt very good so I threw a sour patch kid in it
Sometimes I love sober logical me. She makes rare appearances but when she does she shines.
Don't feel sorry for me. I'm getting Red Lobster and sex tonight. Nothing can bring me too far down.
The only difference between us and a pack of 14 year old girls is substance abuse
I sang him a lovely rendition of 'So Long and Thanks For All the Fish", but replaced fish with dick.
It made me want to take you home, put you in footie pajamas and feed you spaghettios
I made out with a guy so that I could get ahead in the bathroom line, totally acceptable
Yiu ever laugh so hard you stop breathing? Turns out weed -can- kill you.
It's official! Naked girl is back and making stir fry. Still not sure she realizes we can see her whole apartment from our balcony. Cheap beer and a show.
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