Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
3 of us had 22 margaritas. Hellllllo yellow cab. Goodbye morals.
He muttered something about having just washed he sheets, then demanded I give him all my quarters.
dude, i just saw a bobcat while i was rollerblading this morning
1 dont ever text someone @ 8am on sat. 2 dont ever admit to rollerblading past 1992.
We saw some woman wearing leather pants. It was weird. We have decided to follow her on her travels to see where people go in leather pants in Michigan.
he's dressed up as spiderman, i don't understand why he's crying.
We just licked a sour creme and onion chip for salt for a tequila shot. Our vacation has officially begun.
No one even knew you were hurt until we saw the multiple cuts to prove it, and when we asked what happened all you could say was "I fell out"
Complete silence. Background Willy Wonka music. An empty back of Lay's BBQ chips. These are the ingredients for an extreme acid trip.
He ate me out while I was wearing a tiara.... I think I could get used to this
just saw a guy snowshoeing to the liqour store
was it you?
...yes
That's not as bad as watching a dumb ass drunk peeing into your window fan -
My boobs are numb because I've been using them as stress balls
As planned I took it to the limit. Then we met a new limit. Now they are limit friends.
He had Homeward Bound on VHS how was I supposed to not fuck him
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