he kept looking at my chin until i asked why, then he just said he was making sure his balls didnt leave a mark.
but she was nice to me.
She was a fuckin STRIPPER.
I think im in love with that girl with the googlie eyes last night. She was looking in my eyes and at my dick at the same time. we are going out again tonight.
i just heard Winston Churchill in auto-tune. thank you nerds.
No see this is how It goes: guys will fuck virgin girls. But girls don't really want to fuck virgin guys. So you're good have no fear.
I just watched a woman break three wood planks with her boobs. I don't know how I feel about that
On a positive note, new entry in my phone as 'HOT ASS, DOWN TO FUCK'. idk if its a boy or girl tho.
Update, its a couple
That drug basically just makes anything that's in your mouth awesome
Hey they cleaned all the blood out of the elevator. Also could you pick up some nachos?
Ask her if said friend is decent looking or a wildabeast. Need to know if I need to top these 8 coronas off with a little tequila.
Stolen hampster on my tits. Don't tell me I don't know how to party.
you want a dog just so you can strap a barrel of hot chocolate around its neck?
I want to throw pennies on her stage, or just ripping up a dollor bill and throw them one at a time.
With gravity the way it is and your butt clearly being the size of a bus you'd break your hip or something
I BLEED THE BLOOD OF MY ANCESTORS WHO FOUGHT SO BRAVELY FOR MY FREEDOM
cool u want pads or tampons
tampons please
Randomize
