bang him and never speak to him again. also, queef in his face.
i dont this its possible to queef on command.
Dude I think you forgot how to talk last night. We kept asking if you wanted a condom and you just smiled and made weird noises...
when the lights went off, all i could see was the glowing of the camera light in the closet... i got the fuck out of there so fast.
My boyfriend cheated on me...what do I do?! :( JK IM BREAKIN UP WIT DAT
I should take him calling me "a freak of nature" after sex as a compliment, right??
Its that time of week again, Bad life decision wednesday
What are you talking about?! I shot gunned a monster while simaltaneously blowing gym boy Todd. If I'm not the poster child for being well rounded and versatile I have no idea what NYU is looking for
That's what my new years consisted of. Consoling heartbroken girls and having people throw up in my hands.
I wish to strangle
whoa there darth vader
He whispered "Are you feeling it now Mr. Krabs?" when he was inside me. That is NOT my fetish.
I just tinder matched with a blue angels pilot. I need to make out with him. For America.
I literally just ordered a gold medal online that is engraved with his name, "01.01.16", and "BEST SEX EVER"
Is it weird that I have your number saved in my phone as baby Jesus?
all I want for my birthday is booze and sex toys. don't bother calling if neither of those are included.
I've been eaten out in coupes, sedans, trucks, suv's, you name it. If I can do it in a smart car, you can do it in a vw beetle.
I knew you were the expert on doing it in public. You need to get paid for your advise
Randomize
