you think thats bad? Today I had to pop a zit on my sack.
FUCK TREES I CLIMB BUOYS MOTHERFUCKER
STOP listening to that song
So can you tell me who's underwear is on the cat?
I thought he was kidding when he said pretend to be a dunkin donut delivery women. This is the last time I ever role play.
I just figured out, there are 9 children in this world that I can look at in the face and say "I fucked your mom."
There is no way I'm taking advice from somone who's idea of a balanced diet consists of vodka and lemon detox juice
No i'm not calming down the girl at white castle did not need to see the picture of my dick on your phone.
what kind of roommate is she really? she wouldn't even hold my hair back.
you took the tequila shot and then procceded to eat the lime..we told you to spit it out but you just straight face kept chomping
I think I just wrote a poem about your penis but it was totally unintentional.
I'd go lesbian for $50 and a good phone case.
Is it against health code to come into work half drunk and commando?
Cocaine is ok on a cleanse, right?
I don't get a "my roommate is fucking you" discount?!
ps why does my dog smell like popcorn and a dryer sheet..?
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