therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
i woke up this morning in my bathroom,naked, with my boxers around my face and puke and shit on the floor and wondering why i didn't have a toenail on my one big toe.
compared to you, a hobo is quite responsible.
I hope you're ready because I look like an elf on crack had a baby in the medieval era and that baby grew up to be a whore
Yeah, I just met her and we got arrested together. I think it was a good bonding experience.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She broke up with him yesterday after she cheated on him. He's going a bachelor party next weekend. How has Homeland Security not raised the threat level?
totally just got a week extension on my midterm by telling my prof that I had just found out I was adopted
You keep saying things....but all I'm hearing is kegs
Na Im fine, just need to un-grow this vagina I've developed
Its not the fact that i woke up wearing a tutu that bugs me its the fact that i have 75 photos of me wearing a tutu on facebook
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is it really bad that my last patient offered to fuck my brains out if I gave her IV morphine...and I gave her my phone number and told her when my shift is over?
I'm texting an actual stripper. A male stripper. I dont wanna talk about it yet
So "I hate myself Mondays" has extended to Tuesday this week. I just had peanut butter and a glass of wine for lunch.
So baked. About to eat a calzone then hate fuck this guy.
THAT'S MY GIRL
Listen, I've got balls in my face can I call you back
Accidentally drunk dialed my mom last night. Started the conversation with "Where you at girl?"
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