In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
my girlfriends now gay ex-boyfriend kissed me. tell maddie i can't hangout today
I just wish we had the ability to download food from our TVs.
I wish all the girls i wanted to sleep with knew how big my dick was then id have a better chance
We have to use a contraceptive. God help the world if another one of us comes into fruition.
We were eating hotdog buns dipped in French onion dip in lawn chairs at 4am. That drunk
don't get you morals all over my torrid fantasties
We lost a condom inside me, I had to fish it out. The next day he gave me a Gone Fishin' bumper sticker. True love at its finest.
Tranny group. Dance off. Horse hair and dicks swinging. I. Cant. Unsee. This.
He got naked and made a run for the door so I had to stop him.
so...the lady doing my pedi totally noticed the human bite marks on my calf. Who says marriage ends your sex life? Love u!
On one hand it was kinda weird his girlfriends stuff was at his apartment. On the other hand it was kinda nice because she had great shampoo
I swear to go if the response she sends me something along the lines of who the fuck is Mark Hamill I might need to brake up with her.
You blew him?!?!
*Am blowing
And I keep taking breaks to write you back, please stop replying.
So, I woke up under a table with an alarm clock on my face, my hair in a bag of popcorn, and my phone charger wrapped around me.. what happened?
Randomize
