After they won there was a guy outside Magee Hospital yelling "name your kid Sidney"... that guy may or may not have been me.
She made me repeat after her: "I take responsibility for what I put in my own mouth."
i might even pee on it at walmart i am so nervous
Well, you're either very drunk or very high but I'll let it slide because I love any type of conversation concerning cheese.
you came downstairs saying you were now 'dressed to impress'
what was i wearing?
nothing
This could be one of the worst things i've done... The background of her phone is her and her boyfriend.
And I was somehow convinced to wash the glassware at the bar topless.
im still trying to figure out who put the honey mustard in the blender then put the entire blender into the freezer
i am pretty sure she ate my hamster last night. i am thinking this because she left me a note that says she ate my hamster and my hamster is no longer in its hamster cage.
There is a contact in my phone named "Bar Mcntysu." this is why we need a third person to go out with us.
Liz is crying about burritos again.
The dog just shocked himself by peeing on Christmas lights, should I have saw that coming?
We're the worst. Two people without their shit together do not make a functional adult.
Why is it I can't go buy redbull and tylenol pm from a store without getting questions about my health choices?
My brothers dog was hit by a car and died. They're really sad about it.
But they're having a baby! It's like a dog only 40 billion times worse!
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