So, right as I'm cumming, I pull out and go "PYEW PYEW" like Star Wars lasers. Best part is, I missed her completely.
It's weekends like this that make it obvious why we have to pay to come to college.
do you think having her use a clorox disinfecting wipe on her vagina will keep me from getting her herpes if I don't have a condom?
You leave a trail of fuck everywhere you go
What's the rule on cocaine before dinner?
Its 11 o'clock somewhere
Is it possible to have pulled a muscle in my neck from passing out with my head in a bucket?
I'm glad we are bonding over both contracting clamidya. Winners.
100%
Gosh, I don't even have that. Let alone someone to tie me up and whip me with Twizzlers.
Good for him. He wanted to accomplish walking across niagara, I'm hoping to accomplish not throwing up tomoro nite, we all have our own priorities in life.
I can't believe she made out with my 15 year old brother. That kid can seriously pull.
I just hope when I turn 21, it doesn't tank my entire semester.
Just used my flashlight app to find a gummy lifesaver I dropped on the floor
I like how you're utilizing your resources
Uh I almost got the bride to go down on me. I'm the smoothest maid of honor ever.
I'm not gonna ask the guy I've fucked like 3 times if he is insecure about his eyebrows.
I party with great urgency now.
Randomize
