Can we reminisce? I held a mans penis while he peed. This is the craziest night I've ever had.
She made me put my jeans under her mattress so that I wouldn't leave in the morning while she was still sleeping. Apparently I just look like "that guy".
I thought about farting is his face when he was going down on me last nite.
This is one of those times where I really wish my vagina could tell me what happened last night.
Who faxed a picture of their penis to the office printer?!
Swallowing. Like you said. Lions. Always.
when you agree to fuck a guy it does by NO means make it okay for his roommate to hide in the closet with doritos and watch
you were upstairs in your room looking out your window and saw him puking in your bushes outside. you then proceeded to open the window and sing Come To My Window
On a scale from 1 to the worst weekend of my life, that was an 11. I can see again, though.
I got another blow job proposal last night. Skills.
Is she okay?
She may want to issue revenge punches, but medically fine.
I chased him for half a mile, lost him then somehow ended up at his house. Is that still considered stalking? I WAS drunk.
lesbians are really intense tho, she made me take her eye makeup off and told me she was going to eat me for breakfast
As soon as you told us you were an ostrich with a big penis, we began to wonder what you were on and if you wanted to share.
3 weeks in a row I've pulled '69' at the deli counter...God is giving me shit for not getting laid in a year....
Randomize
