My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
How was I supposed to know she would get offended when I asked her how long it took to draw on her eyebrows.
I woke up to him eating cereal out of my viking helmet with a shot glass. No idea where he got the milk.
I have to cancel. My sons dad is out of jail unexpectedly and i'm kinda an emotional wreck. P.s. This is not the life I dreamed of as a little girl.
Dude, she's the greatest salesman alive. she convinced chelsea to buy a box of Cheerios for $20. She can find your dick some willing pussy.
Do you know what your brother wants for his birthday?
Yeah he said he wants a decent blowjob for a change.
.......
I'm just looking out for you.
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
you can't just say no to brian. he was bugging me to get me to drunk for 14 hours straight yesterday. HE DOESN'T GIVE UP
I've found my soulmate with the cardboard Dos Equis man.
She said she wouldn't get out of hand. When the cops showed up she jumped off the 4ft high porch and fell into a ditch. She then buried herself because she was wearing light pants and though the light from the cops flashlights would reflect off her pants. We couldn't find her for 40 minutes.
Before you jump in that vagina remember there's a reason we call her Infectonator.
I'M GOING TO FUCK AN ENTIRE ORCHESTRA AND NOTHING CAN STOP ME
The band club does not count as an orchestra
i have two papers due tomorrow. contemplating if i should take adderall in my anus for full effects
The end of the friendship was inevitable. I hooked up with her cousin and forgot to mention it to her
Sorry I can't pick up... thought process is fine but too stoned to form words.
Randomize
