This ain't no lie cnn says sonny n cher's dtr chastity is going to have sex reassignment surgery to become a man named chaz
Not surprised. I always thought Cher was a very passable post op transexual.
You poured sparks in your panties and NOW you're wondering why you have a UTI?
so i woke up on my toliet naked backwards. good night.
buying booze in bulk is always a bad idea. i wish there was some direct deposit-like system
why is there a handicap sign in the bathtub and an exit sign in the kitchen?
lets deal with that after we figure out where i am
Last thing I remember is Dusty riding the bikes we "borrowed" from the hotel through the CVS while the rest of us picked up the girls who were laughing at him
#1 RULE OF DRINKING: DELETE YOUR EX'S NUMBER FROM YOUR PHONE
FULL ON LADY WOOD. YOU CAN SEE THE VEIN
There's a bachlorette party going on at the bowling alley, so we'll see who wins greatest shitshow tonight.
I'm super stoned watching the vatican smoke cam. Come over.
I just want to have sex that doesn't end like a B-rated horror movie.
What has my life come to that I have to spank someone in morse code?
Considering all of my stomach contents ended up in my center console, I'm a bit peckish.
HE LEFT ME THE DAY AFTER I LET HIM PEE ON ME. If you date him after that, I'll leave the fucking PLANET.
He is married, and has a regrettably large penis. I need to find another one right away to get myself out of this mess.
How big does a penis have to be before it becomes regrettably so?
Randomize
