i dont know whats so great about being respectable.
Which one of you FUCKERS filled the toilet with soil and planted my mothers daisys in it? NOT FUCKING HAPPY
i just used a pokemon card to do blow. i need an adult. now.
After 12 shots he decided to show us knife tricks. You can figure out how it ended
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How the hell did he get a boner in that type of situation?
Dude. Some drunk chick just put an Aussie hat on me and was screaming at me in German. Her friends had to drag her away. Point being, I now have a cool hat.
He wheeled me around walmart in a cart, and stole at least 30 dollars of junior mints fpr me. Best date ever.
if all that ever happens for the rest of forever is drinking wine and eating popcorn, ill be okay
TONGUES ARE JUST MEAT TENTACLES IN OUR MOUTHS OMG
HOW ABOUT I DON'T WAKE UP TO THESE TYPES OF TEXTS
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I started rolling down the window so he pulled into a gas station and i puked all over the side of the car while some dude stared at me. I waved and we drove away
Does this mean I don't have to apologize for launching about 20 bead necklaces at you from the balcony?
I think we need a list of things that are automatic NO's for dating a guy. Married, definitely a no now
It's funny to me the only time that you clean up is when your weed delivery man is on the way.
Exactly man. Who needs doctors when you have vodka and hot knives.
Oh, and let me go get some popcorn, watching you make your own decisions should be quite the shitshow.