I give him blow jobs while he watches sports.. how am I not his gf yet??
i gave him the "yep, i was your girfriend's collegiate lesbian sex story" head nod
when a girl feels in her heart, the way she feels in her vagina, anything is possible.
I cleaned out the fridge, had to pound the brews. I am going to be wrecked for my final at 1
These 19 People Are Into The Grossest Sex Fetishes
I found ecstasy taped in my armpit... thank you drunk Marissa.
Just came during my obgyn appt. I need to get laid.
And you were like "stop making pop tarts, lil bowow" as you grabbed the pop tarts from your ex and consumed them. Teach me your ways.
sitting alone on a bench with a sombrero and a bottle of vodka. really angry i got here before you guys.
i remember going to sleep after the 4th time i threw up this morning and hoping i didn't have to again because then it would be uneven between saturday and sunday. my ocd is getting out of control
People Weigh In On Whether It’s Okay to Bang Your Roommate
SHUT UP I CAN'T HEAR YOU OVER THE SOUND OF UKULELE AND LONLINESS
Yuck. My throat feels like someone chucked a couple of Maltov cocktails down it and finished it off with a super soaker filled with Jameson.
This summer has already been like the best summer ever. FREEDOM IS AWESOME. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND GOD BLESS THE SINGLE LIFE.
For me the most fucked up part of last night was that I know for a fact that you were sober. But your dancing was a close second.
His life is a porno. He snapped me while banging a girl in the back of the ambulance.
We used to bone, but now she's my life coach.