Is masturbating to pics of your ex on Facebook considered cheating?
You are proof that most things are best left unsaid.
went to the bathroom to piss, saw puke in the toilet thought wtf i dont remember puking, then turned around to find a chick i've never seen before passed out in my shower.
I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
The trick is to not slur when purchasing the condoms at 3am
she spent the whole night flailing her arms because "primates are the only species who can move their arms like that and we shouldn't waste it"
According to the bell hop, we stumbled in about 4 and then cannon balled into the pool.
She kept looking at me and saying "you are the scary high".
I think my hand is broken. But his nose definitely is
he was very distressed by my statements that there could have been balls on shoulders without awareness
VAL. THIS MOTHERFUCKER IS LAYING IN MY BED WEARING A CAT SHIRT, VAL. COME SAVE ME, VAL.
I slept naked with a towel wrapped around my waist in case I pissed the bed again
I'm done being drunk I wish I could snap my fingers and be sober
MDMA, margaritas, mashed potatoes and ice cream aren't keto Kristin
conclusion: canadians have really freaky sex
The bartender remember my drink from last sat. I think we just became drocals...drunk. locals.
Randomize
