No, I was feeling sad because all of the other girls were like model-skinny. But then I remembered that I had big boobs and went to hit on their boyfriends.
thats the mark of a good guy. when you can period all over his leg and he still thinks you're beautiful!
If I EVER think it's a good idea to blow someone who just showed me their synchronized swimming performance on youtube again please correct me immediately.
By the way, we're gonna have to get a new rug for the livingroom i kinda started ours on fire...
Even her dad came up for the body shots. Wasn't sure what to do so I just laid there and let it happen...
Malt liquor mondays...better in theory.
The roommate asked me to make sure no one fucked in his room. And then preceded to give only me permission to fuck in his room. Had no idea who I was, just thought I was trustworthy cause I had Edward 40 hands. Felt like a Tarantino movie.
Watching elf, eating a tub of ice cream, and coming to terms with the fact that I haven't had sex in 5 months. Happy fucking holidays.
I'm watching porn in spanish. Thats studying right?
That said I did get head on the roof of a 15 story building which, regardless of quality, is still cool
If anyone needs me I'll be in the bathtub, eating fast food and shooting straight vodka while I seriously evaluate my life choices and cry.
I have a bandage in my ass crack. In. My. Ass. Crack.
I woke up with clothes on this morning and I'm pretty sure you had something to do with that. Thank you.
So is he the one who got away?
They all got away. I’m a catch and release kind of girl.
How drunk were you? in an effort to seduce him, you demonstrated your lap dance skillz on his dog.
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