maybe all of them together would equal one normal sized dick.
well,he told me "i bet you five bucks that i can right cum on the mirror with my cum" i said alright do it, lets just say he's five bucks richer...
You should be grateful to be my roommate. My booty calls always drive you places in the morning.
kinda considering buying a life alert for sophmore year
He leaned in to kiss me and I dodged him but i fell on the floor. I guess I never got up cuz I woke up on the floor and he was in his bed
I think I suffocated him while I was riding his face
did you know that if you have sex in the elevator on the way up that people can still get in?
I wanna take him on a special date, something that says I banged your brother but since he moved I want you
I NEVER left your party last night of anyone asks.
Yeah, I didn't wake up handcuffed to my bed either.
It's like the god of all feather dusters, but for your vagina
It really is the softest mustache
be ready to rage tomorrow. like naked ranch dressing rage
After your flask fell out of your leg brace and you told your RA that it was juice, you tried to unlock your dorm room but your key was attached to your bra so he ended up seeing your boobs
That's totally the Emoji for "just ran into some girl who knows I know she had an abortion"
I just sent a snapchat of my boobs for Adderall. It's finals season.
I figured you were on something. You're way too happy right now to be sober
Randomize
