my debutante medallion kept hitting his balls when i went down on him
I wasn't excited about it either, but if I was going to have her take a load on her face, role playing as some french dude is the least I could do
Just bought an airhorn. Bad things will happen.
He just showed me a video of his erect penis moving to the beet of the music when he was high, I think I'm in love.
We're at the hospital. She got a head rush and fell and now blood everywhere. Smoke the rest, just save her a bowl
I'm hiding in a cabinet. I'm going to stay here.
I started blowing him in North Dakota, and I finished the job in Minnesota. Oh, the places road head can take you.
just used my amazon order history to figure out my anniversary. I am the most epic/shittiest bf ever...
He was making Jim beam nachos. Chips soaked in whiskey with cheese
I'm so drunk. Liken realign drink
Like really drunk?
Or did you enjoy repositioning your drink?
If you magically turned into a tall white gay guy, ignore this message. If not, then I'm sure someone has your fb password.
He has a British accent. He could read me the phone book and I would come so hard he would need a wizened old man in a rowboat to save him.
The ONLY reason I am doing laundry is because all my sweatpants are dirty.
I never thought I would have to put a band-aid on my penis.
It's barely past noon, how am I already talking about double penetration
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