Good. I was naked most of the night. But sometimes I would wear my tux vest...But only my tux vest. It was classy
I woke up, not remembering how or when or why i was even there and looked over to find Steph spooning with an adult black man.
Theres a truck parked on the front yard and i just want to take this opportunity to tell you now that it is not my fault.
What can I say, I bounce back quick. Never thought the line "my turtle died" would get me so many free drinks last night
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You stumbled in the house, mumbled something about a cheese party, grabbed a block of cheese and the whiskey, and left.
Instead of a hangover my body just feels like shame
That is a hangover
I would prefer a headache
I want to see boobs tonight. Like, real ones. Your ones.
I'm romantic.
Most desperate stoner moment; dropped our hard earned resin ball in the sand, rinsed it off and then did knife hits in the kitchen cuz we broke our only pipe
I'm going as your incestuous sister. If thats not the perfect winglady I don't know what is.
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Have you ever had chicken nuggets while high? Because it tastes like hearing the Beatles for the first time
Was your bare penis on or around my blanket?
Showing girls my stab wound was not the brilliant idea I thought it was.
Do you own a cuff key and know where Karen lives?
He left me alone in a hotel room my last night in town to go home to jerk off and watch TV. So yeah, I guess we're not really friends.
boys just don't understand what they're missing out on.
he's missing out on my boobs looking marvelous this evening.
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