is it too early in the day to continue our conversation about penis shapes?
Umm I need a rain check. Long story short is I have scabies. Research it if you want. I'll tell you everything another time soon, I promise.
you're like that jamaican tarat card reading chick... only with herpes
Had to belly crawl across the floor to the toilet with my eyes closed to puke my life out without making my hangover worse. Three times.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sooo the theme of my 21st is rapidly becoming Gay Mexico
shes wearing an ankle tracker so she should be easy to find
I was about to take him home and fuck his brains out but then the police came and arrested him for the stolen credit card he had been buying me drinks with all night...
I found our waiter on grindr, gave him my number, and got him to send a dick pic. Still not getting laid but close enough?
why is "bang the student affairs grad assistant" the third highest thing on your semester goals list
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
YO. MCGRIDDLES.
I can see your house from here
Get off of his fucking roof
I don't even know if he's actually hot or just hot because he plays hockey..
You did not just say that.
NOT PREGNANT HIGH FIVE!
I think my dick has healed enough that we can start having sex again
You know your life has gone off the rails when waking up in a Spanish hospital with alcohol poisoning and no memory of how you got there is not even your top wildest drinking story.
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