The worlds most fuckable chipmunk
im at a loss of words.... a stripper is dancing to a Justin Bieber song.
I love how I just got my coachella ticket and ecstasy in a package deal.
No, he attached a coozie to his crutches so he can carry his beer around the party.
The fire breather is here so I may get my second wind.
I could really do without pictures of your asses in my inbox. That said, I'm extremely jealous that I wasn't involved.
It's home.......I'm going to the store in disguise to get skittles and cake frosting. Then I'll eat the frosting in a dark corner while I cry and wonder what I did to deserve this.
The condom broke. Its OK tho, turns out I was just humping her thigh for 20 minutes. Jager dude, Jager.
Opened my purse to realize I have someone else's birth certificate. What happens to me in college?
It's going to be so weird waking up tomorrow morning fully rested completely sober and not covered in piss or bruises.
We're shaving superhero symbols into our pubes. I call dibs on Batman.
He let me finish eating my sandwich while I sat his face. I think I'm in love with this little eager beaver.
So you don't take a regular pic with her, but you take a selfie with her ass. Interesting...
I vote we just hike, drink, and destroy dick
I'm glad you found someone that both loves you and is cool doing coke off your tits. Proud of you.
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