Shit chicky whatchu wearin rt now, ur skins?
Oh dear, kinda... in ur sweats!
U look good, r we getting naked in ur car?
It was kinda weird being the boss
Did you feel like Tony Danza?
So Jesus turned water into wine. So what? I once turned a whole student loan into natty light. Your move holy man.
he used the word "rubber" i just couldn't do it after that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Idk, it's Grover wearing a sombrero. Do I need a reason?
ummm i just drove by ur house and ur passed out on the porch. please call me when u get this
Sorry I sent so many blank messages. My hands are slippery. Don't ask why.
I may have just serenaded the sadface couple sitting on a bench outside the dorm by singing Bye Bye Bye.
Lol. No. We cannot eat chicken while we have sex. No.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yea, you were talking about how you did not want to be a reindeer for at least 5 minutes.
I went online and donated $30 to his walk-a-thon as a "sorry I puked in your bed last night"
Oh my god he's laying on a longboard singing the song from cool runnings.
Call me and get me out of this conversation NOW. My coworker is talking to me about her birds having sex again...
ugffhh I have work in 4 hours and have recieved zero sleep, seeing that I'm trapped in the arms of a snoring bear man. can't. breathe. lost in the forestry of his chest hair.
you know it was a good night when you wake up with a medal around your neck
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