Did you just throw up mid-sentence?
you were mad bc i took longer then 2 minutes to finish
its a sex-hate relationship...no love involved
Don't be alarmed at the kitchen mess. I had to shoot the fire extinguisher on the toaster oven, one quick blast. It was a matter of safe over sorry.
I'm serious. My alarm label is "BAR TABS" as motivation for me to wake up in the morning and go to work.
We play this game where we catch up on what we missed over five years of not talking to eachother, then we have sex like nothing ever happened.
SOMEONE WITH THE TWITTER HANDLE "METHLAB" FAVORITED THAT PICTURE
NOTHING IN THE WORLD IS GOOD SOFT
NOT ICECREAM NOT DICKS
NOTHING
the police report says i screamed sanctuary from a jungle gym at the playground when they caught up with us, obviously they disregarded international law.
Let's put it this way. Mom is bringing me a new shirt and I smell like lube.
You ghosted you're own booty call. Wow what a sad sad man.
We're starting to light shit on fire, bring a metal bucket. Be prepared, Jimmy's off his meds.
No no no, I want to share him with you. Think of it as me sharing a piece of delicious pie with you. He was THAT GOOD.
He's my blizzard buddy. We're blowing lines and doing a 3D game of thrones puzzle
I know her cup size but not her name....
Randomize
