don't you miss dr. quinn: medicine woman? i do.
Seriously, it was like sucking my thumb.. and im not even saying that to be spiteful b/c he is a really nice guy.
I just sneezed and it tasted like taco bell.
We were making out in the bushes when some dude comes and starts peeing beside us.
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You can't be mad at me for wanting to drink though, it is the reason we're engaged
it's like a walk of shame rule, you always run into someone who saw you wearing that yesterday
At least we kept it together. It's people like him who yell at bushes that give acid a bad name
Then he kept saying sentences and ending them all with "the point of no return" even if it didn't make sense, and kept telling this other guy he wouldn't be his "wife son"
And fyi howling is not an acceptable form of communication.
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And by "schedule" I meant crumbled up liquor store receipt, that I wrote shit on.
I feel like telling him your vigina was older than him was not a good pick up line.
Mistakes were made. Hot mistakes that I want to make again. But tapping your employee is def a mistake. Esp in front of two other employees.
View of Vancouver Bay is obscured though the greasy hand prints from fucking against the window. Tip maid well.
I'm going to smell of sex and shame.
How is that different than any other Monday night?
Can I come kidnap you from work so we can chug mimosas? My little brother has a ski mask I can borrow.
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