haha my mom just sent us out to go to all of the hair cutting places to ask for hair because deer ate all our zuchini.. and we have to pee in a bucket all day cause deer hate urine. please tell me we are normal?
i cant lie to you.
you're putting all your eggs in a very hungover basket
im at a loss of words.... a stripper is dancing to a Justin Bieber song.
I'm someone's dream girl. I'm hungover in this guy's bed wearing ONLY a Brian Westbrook jersey. Not the same I was on a date with last night.
The moment that kid turns 18, I will have his sperm for all three meals.
Oh God. You're going to jail
In your defense, I really thought capturing that alligator would have been a lot more awesome and a lot less tragic.
RIP Mr Bojangles.
You were screaming across the bar "BUYING US SHOTS ISN'T GOING TO MAKE US STRAIGHT, YA KNOW!!!!!!!!"
Life for us students isn't all fun and drunken lesbian affairs you know
well in the interest of full disclosure I have been using a used kfc spork as a buttscratcher for a month
Did you blackout Saturday before or after we had sex in a random snow bank?
She got drunk on the air plane and pretended to be an elephant for an hour...Atleast the kid behind us enjoyed it.
My Canadian brought me three bottles of maple syrup, a sunflower, and a pair of Oakleys back to the states...he's either drunk or he loves me
Just cried because I'm out of oreos. This post-molly depression can go fuck itself.
Moral of the story: fuckboys never change
fuck st louis. fuck their hockey. fuck their basball. fuck their football if they still got it. fuck their tiddlywinks teamm. fuck their ribs. fuck their entire city. what im trying to say is i dont like st louis
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