Yes someone did see you carrying a beer bong on the side of coastal highway
He's crying and calling me out on using him. It's awful. And I'm too drunk to leave.
we all took turns holding you up and pretending that you were simba and that we were presenting you to the jungle
I think being an adult is being able to say no to free shots...I need to work on that.
This is simple. Just sex and high fives. No feelings.
there's still three solo cups of your puke in my basement. so that needs to be solved at some point.
We used a snorkel as a funnel. Can you say desperate?
My class coordinator for bio told us that the only thing we should do the night before an exam is to get laid. And then party down after the exam. I like him.
The lady at walmart just said she is so happy im still alive....Was i that drunk on the 4th? Dont answer that
I took a sleeping pill while he was in the bathroom. Time for a game of how long can we bang before I fall asleep.
You are both horrible and amazing
You can't do wine Netflix and blow jobs in the bed you've had since 5th grade with your parents downstairs
It's the Ides of March, motherfucker. That means we're supposed to daydrink, right?
MY MOM WALKED IN WHILE I WAS EATING THEM OUT AND STARTED ASKING US ABOUT THE PROJECT RUNWAY EPISODE WE WERE WATCHING EARLIER
Drinking wine while working. Yay.
Just had sex at the YMCA.
We are so productive today.
Found your brother. He was passed out in the tub holding a bottle of Shatto milk wearing nothing but his tighty-whities.
Randomize
