you miss my big massive throbbing cock dont you?
Woah.
that's not how you spell hell yes.
last night i was so high that when a homeless person asked me for a dollar, i responded: dolla dolla bill ya'll.
Correct me if I'm wrong here... but did we serenade each others breasts to "winds of change" last night?
it's like russian roulette but with a penis
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i robbed the continental breakfast last night
I should start riding the bus again so I can drink all day
he stopped during sex, told me i smelled like McDonald's and went harder..
From scraping the remnants from a coke bag at a lingerie party to meeting with an 80 year old man to discuss civil rights all in under 12 hours bizarrely feels like the epitome of my life
Dude that's beautiful. I've never heard of someone smoking with their bunny.
I feel like I have a connection with him. A marijuana-induced-spiritual connection.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So, left this guys house wearing a #1 Grandpa shirt and I think this is the best sex score I've ever had.
You're the only guy I know who could convince a lady at the pharmacy to trade you her pain pills for your antibiotics.
I just had sex with the kid I walked next to at my first holy communion
Is it ok to bone a former patient who is also a client? Since it is two negatives does that cancel and become a positive?
Im drinking a CAN of bud light at the bar. Do you really think I care anymore?
So, is Canada considered an excessive distance to go for a booty call? Asking for a friend...
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