Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
I swear to god Optimus Prime and Megatron are fighting in my head right now.
He can't get past my hymen. At least that's what he said it feels like.
She just did a myspace photoshoot with her baby
I always have to poop after I paint my nails. It never fails.
Forgot to mention there might be a picture of me being thrown in the air while at a Mexican restaurant
Slipping me an edible before my ochem final was not your brightest idea. Looks like I'm switching to business.
Why are you seriouly talking to me about this when there naked pics of blake lively on the internet? Priorities man...
you really need to stop getting laid in my dreams more than i do.
Getting stoned and sitting front row in a legal class.. Not my best idea
It's like your tits told gravity 'fuck you, I'm fine right here!'
QUIT RUINING DICK PICTURE DAY
He gave me an orgasim so fantastic that I had an asthma attack.
He sang a ten minute song about me sitting on his face and eating quesadillas. Pretty sure I have to marry him.
He literally had a Trump sign in his front yard. I just can't now.
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