Turns out, Windex will cut right through semen stains on a computer case.
i just used google streetview to figure out where i spent the night last night
Kelly Kapowski is pregnant and it's not Zach Morris'. I no longer believe in true love.
he actually proposed, and i threw up on him...i guess 5 glasses of wine was a bad idea.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just passed a Taco Bell Taco Supreme, still in its wrapper, laying in the grass. I'd like a moment of silence.
May it rest in peace.
Give me one reason I shouldn't put the phrase "sex emotions" into my essay.
No.
He's like the unplanned child of drunkenness
My dad, when he got home and saw me loading a bowl in the living room: "We have TWO beautiful balconies to get high on and you pick the couch?!"
I think I left my chapstick at your house when I tried using your penis as a catapult and flung it on the floor. Be a dear, and try to see if you can find it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
please tell me we weren't that bad as freshmen
i can't, we're worse now
I feel like I'm going to get the reputation of being the girl who brings her dog with her to all her random hookups.
He laid on the ground 100 ft from the car crying about how he just wanted to be home already
Dude, my ex girlfriend showed up, bought me a tequila shot, made out with me and then disappeared into the night. Then her current girlfriend saw, so she came over and slapped me and then I made out with her too
This was before halftime
I RUINED A LESBIAN RELATIONSHIP BEFORE HALFTIME
Yes. He better. Or I will shave a penis into his beard while he sleeps.
i came so much i feel like i were to try again, only dust would come out. and maybe glitter
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