So you refered to him as "monster dick"...not so much
you kept singing the copa cabana and saying HAVE A BANANA to random people on the street. you also went up to this poor short guy and hugged him while proceeding to yell I LOVE YOU CHILD MAN into his face. please tell me you're sober now
Superbowl and Mardi Gras a week apart. World's longest bender here I come.
why does the wii remote smell like your vag?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just looked in the mirror and i look like ive been gang banged. Im so proud of my boyfriend it almost hurts
You told him that your vagina was the "King Crab" of all vagina's.
I'm missing some hair, but it's cool. Breadsticks are done.
I stuck a note to his door with my gum explaining why i couldn't spend the night. as i was walking away, he opened the door...i fell down and played dead. deffinitly didn't see me.
I pull out like 90% of the time, but that's just to make art.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
ok it turns out chain mail does not protect against falling down a flight of stairs. please send help.
i tried to break up pigeon sex because one looked too young to consent. fireball feminism ftw
My mom just asked if I've gotten any girls pregnant how is your day going
I'm like a hairless cat ready to be ravished
So let me get this straight I was getting drunk with our science teacher from high school and you got drunk with an 82 year old woman who invited you back to her house and made you sandwiches.
Yes.
Watching porn.....Adele is playing in the background...so many emotions right now...so many.
Randomize