glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
Eating a girl out that was just in the ocean does not make her taste like saltwater taffy
Prostitute standing on the corner thrusting at cars as they drive by. New marketing strategy?
at the resort hottubing with french twins, who brought champange. this should be a postcard.
I feel like a need a fire hose to wash off what I did last night
He told me I had nice tits + they have a great shape. + then proceeded to flatten my boob + show me what the gross tits he's seen look like.
i think i figured out where our problem might have started...when we poured more tequila on top of out margaritas to melt the ice bc they were too cold
hahaha or putting rum in the bbq sauce?
We are lost and the only things we have are peanut brittle, cookies and vodka. I think we'll make it.
Found a popcorn kernel in my pubes... Time fir a Brazilian
I feel like that's something that he should've asked me over dinner..... instead of with his hand down my pants? maybe not
See! Theres potential!
Oh yeah. All good relationships start with a threesome.
I am literally sitting here with a jar of Nutella and a spoon, reading an article called "never drink alone again because now there's wine for cats." How single am I?
The last thing I remember is goading each other into a vodka-chugging competition.
if becoming an adult is chugging a bottle of wine in your bed and crying about your stresses while your dog watches you, sign me up
You're a FUCKING ASSHOLE. Love mom
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