He is such a slut. More and more my type.
I just came so hard I farted. Twice. Thank God I'm alone.
i either just walked in on pete wacking off to webmd or he was checking his dick for herpes
im pretty sure one of the guys i was dancing with at graffiti wrote on my back "you rock". now feel like a danced with a 5 year old.
She put her phone in her underwear and it somehow managed to work it's way into her vagina. she has a BLACKBERRY.
I have a critically important question to ask.
Why does watermelon-flavoured candy exist?
well, someone with very low standards is getting their dick sucked
That's what you get for fucking someone nicknamed "wiggle worm"
we're like Indians of the 21st century. trading not for food and survival but personal gain and by trouble you mean getting daytime drunk and going to the roller ring then yes.
Dude. I'm super jealous I'm not there. Plus I look really pretty tonight, I'm wearing my long blue dress, I have long blonde hair, and I'm just sitting here hitting Larry the Long Bong. I'll pretend like your 3 spirits are floating in my smoke. Fuck.
Dude, you need to man up. You passed out before a PRESEASON game. It's a long season.
Just FYI, by the transitive property my breasts have now touched the Stanley Cup.
After the first time we had sex he kept saying "I'm proud of you" over and over again
But unlike the human Walter the plant Walter will someday grow to satisfy my needs
totally just bought a bottle of gin with nothing but change
don't ever let anyone tell you that youre not 100% class
Randomize
